06/01/2026
You're loading the dishwasher, and your spouse says something about "when I retire."
It's a small thing, and you probably both let it pass.
But that one word, "I" instead of "we," is the opening to the one of the most important conversations the two of you haven't had yet, the one about what you actually want the coming years to look like.
It's easy to put off, especially because we tend to think of retirement as a number to reach and a date to circle. But it's really much deeper than that.
It's a vision you've nurtured for years, although sometimes without realizing you haven't shared all the details.
I've seen a lot of married couples approach retirement without having had that conversation, and it complicates what should be one of the most enjoyable times of your life.
That's why vision and values get top priority when I'm first getting to know new clients. Not because the numbers don't matter, but because the two of you working toward the same goal is what the numbers are for.
And that's the foundation for all the planning that follows.
We talk a lot about benchmarks and key indicators in financial services. One I listen for most often when working with married couples? How often I hear "we" in our conversations.