04/12/2025
10 new taxes the Chancellor avoided in the Budget
• Zoom Face Tax – £2 each time you say, “Can you see my screen?” when you clearly can’t.
• Inbox Zero Tax – payable by anyone who publicly claims to have achieved it. (Doubles if they post about it on LinkedIn.)
• Self-Checkout Tax – 5p per “unexpected item in the bagging area.”
• Password Reset Duty – £3 each time you click ‘Forgot password’.
• Hybrid Working Hypocrisy Tax – £10 for every manager who says “work from anywhere” but frowns when you actually do.
• LinkedIn Humblebrag Duty – £50 per post that begins “I’m honoured and humbled to announce…”
• Dishwasher Diplomacy Tax – £10 fine for re-stacking someone else’s perfectly good attempt.
• Weather Small-Talk Duty – 20p per conversation opened with “Cold, isn’t it?”
• DIY Overconfidence Charge – £50 for starting a project with “How hard can it be?”
• Autocorrect Excise – 10p for every text where “ducking” was clearly not the intended word.
Credit to the Tax Advice Network
